Striped Toe Socks

Monday, October 11, 2010

Mama Time

I'm amazed that Grace is almost three months old. Some days I feel like I have everything together. We have gotten into a routine and that feels good. I'm the kind of person who likes a schedule. Newborns don't have schedules and that, along with the lack of sleep, was hard in the first couple months. Grace has even slept through the night {10:30-6} a couple times.

I think the thing I have had the hardest time adjusting to is not having a little time alone.Although, when I'm not with her I feel like my arm is missing. I've decided when I can get it I need to take ten minutes to do nothing, or to knit or surf the web. I need to be able to refresh a little. Getting the time isn't nearly as difficult;t as feeling ok about taking it or about wanting it. I put a lot of "I should" pressure on myself. As in, I should unload the dishwasher right now or I shouldn't need a break from my daughter.

Grace has changed in incredible ways in just the last few weeks. She smiles all the time and nothing makes me happier than her delight. She has recently discovered her thumb. (adorable!) She is completely lazy and has no real interest in rolling over. She does love to lay on her back and watch the ceiling fans. We call them her BFFs, she kicks and squeals and smiles up at them.

In brief knitting news I'm slowly moving along with the Infinity scarf. If Grace had been born on time instead of two weeks early I would have finished my Harry Potter Dark Mark bag, but I don't have the brainpower  time to put into a chart right now. It feels good to something for me that I love. I didn't have a lot of knitting motivation when I was pregnant and that is slowly returning to me.

The schedules and sleep and being a full time SAHM are all evolving together from the me of the past into a new me. I felt a little lost in the beginning. The person who entered the hospital that day wasn't the same person who left. After I realized I was really in labor I started crying that everything was going to change and I was right, it did. And it feels really good.

(My apologies for how scattered this post is)
posted by Ginny at 12:18 AM

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